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tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  May 30, 2012 9:30am-10:00am PDT

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n my own place ♪ ♪ i'm stood here naked, smiling, i feel no disgrace ♪ ♪ with who i am ♪ happiness coming and going... ♪ >> may 29, 2012 from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with jon stewart. ["daily show" theme song playing] [cheers and applause] captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: hey, everybody. welcome back to the show. boom, we're back. thank you. thank you for joining us. welcome to "the daily show". i want to say right off the top u.s.s. roosevelt bringing the nice pictures and the guys bringing the nice things and some guy from england who -- i don't know.
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[ laughter ] [ applause ] has a diseased mind. [ laughter ] we're so happy to be back. i'm jon stewart. our guest tonight is the author of a great new book on home gardening. [ laughter ] and -- [cheers and applause] -- anyway, we're excited to have the first lady tonight. first, real quick off the top. we've been out of office two weeks. when i'm on vacation the only news i keep up is the latest. obviously i read the huffington post my one stop source. the latest scoop involves miley cyrus and her side boob. next 20 that i crossing this story about how roger ailes said i admitted to him in a bar that
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i'm a socialist. now, i didn't doubt the story. [ laughter ] i know watching fox news makes you misinformed. but running it doesn't. but i couldn't remember so -- and this is true, i called him not on the phone. i sat in front of the mirror and said his name three times. so, sorry. no. he called me back. very gracious he called me back. roger ailes called me back and reminded me that 12 years ago we met in philadelphia at the republican convention in a bar and then it all came flooded back. great party, roger ailes, the head of fox news. great party. >> thanks.
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>> jon: ever tell you how much i love socialism? just love it. the whole redistribution. >> listen andy dick just took a (bleep) on your sundae bar. have a got night, okay. >> i should go take care of that. >> jon: all right see you, roger ailes, head of fox news. [ laughter ] oh, yeah, you know, the real question there, one, why did i go to an eyes wide shut orgy dressed as yeehaw albert brooks? [ laughter ] it concerned to me i'm an old and unattractive man now. really. and two, why didn't roger ailes mention when he admitted to me before which was -- and obviously it's been a lot of years and i'm paraphrasing but i
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think what he said to me once was jon, did i ever tell you that i, roger ailes, plan to undermine the role of an independent president. while at the same time -- [ laughter ] filling the editorial vacuum that that creates by filling the propaganda juggernaut from the guys at a news organization. [cheers and applause] he said to me, he goes, jon, i'm going to call the organization fox news and it's tag line will be -- you're going toll love this -- a fanatically micro managed five dom where my own personal agenda drive every aspect of the operation and balance. i'm paraphrasing. something like that. [ laughter ] anyway so that goes down. and then came this clip unearthed by a conservative web
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site. >> i think you are a democrat, jon. >> jon: i think that's probably correct. i would say i'm more of a socialism or independent. oh, my god! i look great. wow! dhawz. wow. [cheers and applause] you know what i just realized that interview was conducted just moments -- moments before larry king drained me of my youth. [ laughter ] let me explain to you when i think i meant by the comment on that show seeing i have at various times described myself as socialist, independent, wig, rockefeller independent p teddy roosevelt democrat and (bleep). [ laughter ] i don't believe in state control of industrial or collectizing -- collectivizing farms but i
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believe there's value in policies that derive from a more socialist ethos. >> i think social security is an important program. >> jon: like social security. thank you courageous comrade. i believe in that a socialized program to ease poferly among the elderly that we all contribute to. what else would be socialist? >> medicare will save the safety net of health care coverage that our esteemed elders in country need. >> jon: see you at the meeting, sister sara. i used the term socialism in the year 2000 before obama ruined it for everybody. >> barack obama is a socialist. it's that simple. >> he's obviously a socialist. >> his socialist policies are bankrupting america. >> his socialist policies are
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ruining america. >> jon: yes, socialism is a new s word. the worse thing you can call someone. it's like if the c word and the n word had a baby. [ laughter ] and that baby's name: obama. >> obama care is quite clearly the crown jewel of socialism. >> obama care is the flagship of socialism. it's pure unadult rated socialism. >> jon: uncut, got stuff. [ laughter ] apparently socialism is like cholesterol social security and medicare are the good kind. obama care is the bad kind, unadult rated socialism, a program where everyone will be forged to buy health insurance in a competitive marketplace of private profit insurance companies, the marxist dream.
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get the foaton by my desk. yes, that's better. [ laughter ] some would say -- some would say isn't our current system of health care more like socialized medicine because we're subsidizing the millions of citizens without health insurance? well, shut up! [ laughter ] because obama's real socialist scheme has nothing to do with health care. >> he's basically socialized the auto industry. he is moving to free market capitalism to socialism. he socialized auto caps. >> i hope you enjoy your new line of socialist cars america, the amc kremlin, the cliftless le baro, the che-rolet. now that the tax pair bailout that allowed -- any socialists
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out there courageous enough to take the credit? >> that was the right course. i argued for it from the beginning. finally when that was done and help was given companies got back on their feet. i'll take credit for the fact that this industry has come back. [ laughter ] >> jon: here is how you know -- here is how you know when a socialist policy has worked? when a staunch capitalist takes credit for it with a hostile takeover. not every obama socialist is worthy of the romney name. >> it's part of trying to remake the american economy in a socialist model. you have the government going in picking winners and loser and in the case of solyndra picked a clear loser. >> you are socializing this country. >> joe: you don't pick winners and losers in the government. you let the market decide and
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this solar panel company, no -- any government subsidy of private enterprise is wrong. >> that's a subsidy, allow that industry to get up and running and it's something which i support. >> jon: what the (bleep). so wait -- in terms of subsidies, let me get this straight, in terms of subsidies, sun to solar panels to energy socialism, sun to corn to energy -- america! can't we just admit a socialist is someone who wants to spend government money or (bleep) you don't like. then we can dispense with the name calling and find an industry we agree is great. >> house resolution 670 offered by the distinguished gentleman from pennsylvania would congratulations pits buferg
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steelers on winning the 2006nfl title. >> jon: that's what i'm talking about. profootball, america what is more american than the nfl. it's a business built to run the right way. >> the real key is the unorthodox business model. under league rules the teams are required to share revenue with each other which is always a sticking point with some of the most successful franchises and the more politcally conservative owners. >> that's socialist, isn't it? >> it's a form of socialism and it's worked quite well for us. >> jon: burn him! burn him! we'll be right back. [cheers and applause]
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>> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight she's the first lady of united states. she has written a book called "american grown: the story of the white house kitchen guard and gardens across america." please welcome back to the program first lady michelle obama. [cheers and applause] how are you? >> good. [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] >> jon: nice to see you.
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>> it's good to be here. good to be back. >> jon: nice to see you again. this is my book. >> jon: it's called "american grown." you as first lady, everybody has an issue. you decided i'm going to take on this idea of getting children to eat well. >> yes. >> jon: wouldn't you have been more successful with let's say colonization of mars? lafer laugh as a parent of two children, unless this garden sprouts cheeseburgers, no. [ laughter ] how -- what gave you the idea to do this? it was really my experience as a mother trying to get my kids to eat well. you know what most people don't know we're seeing an epidemic of childhood obesity. one in three of our kids will be over weight or obese and we're spending billions of dollars in health care costs for preventable illnesses. in my life, i saw how that was
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happening. two busy parents, don't have time to cook. eating out too much. activity is being eliminated from our schools in many ways. the average kid is spending 7.5 hours a day in front of a screen. the average kid. that's on average. >> jon: can i just very quickly -- kids, if you are at home right now -- [ laughter ] daddy says you can beat that. daddy knows you are not average, kids. [ laughter ] i want to see ten hours from you today. my kids can make this. >> no! >> jon: did i get that wrong? >> no, no, go the other way around. >> jon: we used to -- in the old days they opened the back door, you went out and you ran. but it's a difficult world. >> it's a different world, yeah. with modern life thins are changing. many kids are living in communities where their parents don't feel safe having them run
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outside, right? >> jon: right. >> fast food is the exception -- the rule rather than the exception. just culturally. >> jon: it's cheaper show. trying to feed power to people a dollar menu with good food on it. is this for you more of a symbolic idea that they start to understand understand? >> the garden is the way to begin the conversation. i learned in changing my kids habits, if they are involved in the growing process of food and they get a sense of where it comes from and they are engaged, they tend to be excited about it. the garden is a really important catalyst for that discussion. we've had hundreds of kids working with us in the guard ton help plant and harvest. usually with the harvest we end with a vegetable feast. we've got kids who -- >> jon: the phrase vegetable feast -- >> it's a feast!
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>> jon: is there a cheese faucet for this vegetable feast? >> we've served everything from flat bread veggie pizza that many kids said is better than takeout. because the truth is that vegetables grown fresh taste better. i know you got those store bought tomatoes in the plastic tin that tasted like water. >> jon: or the boil in the bag in the crazy yellow sauce that she said is say butterrish substance. >> you cooked broccoli until you could cut wit a fork. it's not supposed to be that way. when you get kids engaged in pulling a tomato off the vine. >> jon: engage your children. >> in the process. >> jon: talk to them. do not leave them outside. can you stick around? go to commercial and we'll come back for more. >> yes. >> jojo
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chawdz. >> jon: we're back. we're talking to first lady "american grown." getting your kids healthier, involved with exercise. it's interesting to me you as first lady you have an approval rating of 85% to 90%. it's not that high. >> jon: it's through the roof. >> you exaggerate. >> jon: but it is. you are ice cream -- >> he's vegetables.
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>> jon: my point is -- [ laughter ] forget poll tikdz or any of that in just marital relationship in just arguing, how do you not use that? [ laughter ] and wield it -- if i had an 80% approval rating and my wife was at 50% i'd be like really? because the people say -- [ laughter ] does that ever -- >> no, no, i don't wield it over him. one of the things i've seen over the last three and a half years. i've seen what it takes to be president. i kind of watch this thing pretty closely. [ laughter ] you know, the president is getting all the hard decisions where there's no easy answer. that's the kind of stuff that comes across his desk. really when it comes down to it when you are making judgment calls, all you have is your character, your value, your vision for this country.
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i see him being so consistent in disregarding the chatter and the noise and really moving forward towards a country where there's more equity, more fairness, where our kids grow up in schools that educate them. where they have opportunities. >> jon: have you seen him change in his decision-making as the gravity has -- did it start out more dart board-ish and then move? right exactly? >> never, never. >> jon: never. >> in fact the harder decisions he has been so consistent. he told america what i was going to do. pass health care, make sure that more people have access to health care and our kids can start their lives with insurance as opposed to graduating from college without insurance. he ended the war in iraq. brought our troops home, making sure they get the benefits and respect that they've earned. >> jon: are you -- are you -- because i didn't know that.
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i was not -- i have not been following this. are there people in the white house that says i could do that job. >> seven like glad i don't have that john. >> jon: what about biden, joe? [ laughter ] ever think like -- >> i love joe. >> jon: i love joe, too. is it hard to raise a kid around biden? because i would assume -- [ laughter ] there's a lot of like joe, language. [ laughter ] or like he's like the uncle that comes over like oh, you brought some guns. that kind of thing s. that -- -- is that something -- >> no, no he's a great vice president and he's a great friend. >> jon: that's nice. >> my kids hang around him and i'm good with it. >> jon: we are reading stories
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about your husband in high school and college. >> what was he doing? >> jon: what is that the script of a cheech and chong movie. when you met him did you put the cie bash -- >> he was like many young people. he realized he he with do more. you are his mother said you are so gifted, so talent. slap him on the head and say get yourself together. he lost his father that was one of those moments. he transferred schools went to columbia and thought about how to use his life to the fullest. that was before me. >> jon: interesting. this president, george w. bush went through his times where he was a little bit out there. i really related to that. it's the turn around -- that's the part where i'm --
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>> i'm not taking any bait. [ laughter ] >> jon: it's organic. i see what this man sees in you. you did very good. just saying need a little help out there. get out there. >> plant a garden. it's a good way to start. >> jon: that would be very nice. first lady michelle obama. thank you so much for coming. -x
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